Debbie's Perspective

Just my thoughts of the day.

Feb 2

Selective Listener?

by Debbie

Luke 6:27a ~ “But to you who are willing to listen, I say, love your enemies!

I was just walking toward the kitchen as my husband walked past me and quickly said, “Don’t worry, I have already asked her to clean it all up.”  Then he promptly left the house for work.

I hesitantly walked around the corner and came face to face with my teenage daughter using her feet on two dish towels swiping away at the floor.  When she saw the look on my face she said, “Mom, you should be glad that I already cleaned up a lot of it.  It was really messy earlier.  Great! I thought as I surveyed the flour and powdered sugar dusted counters, the sink and counter full of dishes, and the little drifts of powdered sugar clinging to two of the cabinet doors.

I was already frustrated irritated, okay let’s be really honest, I was angry with her over two other incidents in the last couple of days.  So last night when she just had to bake these cookies for the school project – at 10:30 p.m. – I went to bed.

After cleaning the kitchen (grudgingly because the bus doesn’t wait, and let’s face it, her cleaning methods were just making a bigger mess at the moment), but having her make her own lunch because I was taking care of her mess, I sat down to have a little quiet time with the Lord hoping for a new perspective on things.  He never disappoints.

I was reading the verse that practically screamed off the page at me, “But to you who are willing to listen…”  Well, of course, I listen.  Those who don’t would be the unbelievers or those who pick and choose what they want out of the Bible, right? I felt the Holy Spirit nudge at my heart and ask, “Are you sure it isn’t talking about you?”

Okay, Lord, show me what you want me to see.  He said, “Well, now that you are willing to LISTEN, I’d be happy to show you.  Just keep reading.”  As I read about how I am to love, be good to, bless, and pray for my enemies, I realized I wasn’t even doing that for my family so how could I possibly do it for my enemies.  Oh no! I was a selective listener.

Of course I love my family, I do good for them, I bless them, and I certainly pray for them.  I justified the situation; after all, I was just a little mad at the moment.  But wait, this passage doesn’t stop at those.  Oh goodness, there is more!  What about turning the other cheek, offering my shirt when my coat has been demanded of me, and giving freely without asking for anything in return?  Surely this isn’t talking about my situation because I’m dealing with my child, not enemies.

Hmmm, let’s see.  The end of verse 35 says that if I do all of these things I will truly be acting as a child of the Most High, for He is kind to those who are unthankful and wicked.  Then in verse 36 Jesus says, “You must be compassionate, just as your Father is compassionate.”

I know sometimes I have to chastise and discipline my children, and it is clear in God’s word that He does that to us, His children, because He loves us.  But, He is also compassionate toward us, and sometimes just makes sure we are listening and then teaches us the right things to do.

 

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Nov 12

SHE BELIEVED

by Debbie

As I thought about the coming Advent season this morning, I decided to read the story of Jesus’ birth to begin to prepare my heart.  It always amazes me how the Lord can show me new things in a story I’ve read or heard multiple times.  Today He amazed me once again.

Gabriel appeared to her and said, “Greetings, favored woman! The Lord is with you! ~ Luke 1:28

Mary was favored.  Why?  What was it about her that caught God’s attention? Why did He choose her to be the mother of His son? Did she do something special or did He just pick her out of a group of girls her age who were descendants of David?

I read on. I found some clues to why I think God chose Mary.

The angel of the Lord visited her and told her that she would conceive a son, name him Jesus, he would be great, would be called the Son of the Most High, be given the throne of David, and would reign over Israel forever.  Wow, pretty incredible stuff! She didn’t ask about all of that, she just wanted to know how it would happen; not all the great stuff, but how was it physically going to happen to her?  She was a virgin. She was saying, “What will I have to do to conceive this baby? How will it happen?”

Once she was told, she agreed, even though the ramifications to her could have been devastating. She would be pregnant and not married. Her fiancé, Joseph, would know it wasn’t his. Would anyone believe her story? She could have been stoned for adultery, but she still said yes.  Why?

I think the answer comes in the next few verses.

One thing Elizabeth says to her jumped out at me.

You are blessed because you believed that the Lord would do what he said.” ~ Luke 1:45 NLT

This is happening to her because she believes that the Lord does what He says, but this verse doesn’t say “will” do, it says “would” do. It doesn’t mean that she believes that the Lord will do what the angel said He would do.  The next verses in the beautiful Magnificat reveal the deeper belief Mary had.

Luke 1:46 – 55 ~ Mary responded,

“Oh, how my soul praises the Lord.
How my spirit rejoices in God my Savior!
For he took notice of his lowly servant girl,
and from now on all generations will call me blessed.
For the Mighty One is holy,
and he has done great things for me.
He shows mercy from generation to generation
to all who fear him.
His mighty arm has done tremendous things!
He has scattered the proud and haughty ones.
He has brought down princes from their thrones
and exalted the humble.
He has filled the hungry with good things
and sent the rich away with empty hands.
He has helped his servant Israel
and remembered to be merciful.
For he made this promise to our ancestors,
to Abraham and his children forever.”

There it is right there!  Mary knew the covenant promises of God and she already believed they would come to pass. She didn’t just know them, she believed them.  Her praises are filled with references to the Law, the Psalms, and the Prophets.

Mary wasn’t just another Israelite girl who was the right age and of the right lineage.  She was a girl who had her heart filled with the Word of God! So when God called on her to be the vessel to bring His son into the world, she was ready and willing.

Another key to how Mary continued in her calling, even through the challenges it would bring, came in another part of the story.

After seeing him, the shepherds told everyone what had happened and what the angel had said to them about this child.  All who heard the shepherds’ story were astonished, but Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often.  The shepherds went back to their flocks, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen. It was just as the angel had told them. ~ Luke 2:17 – 20

Mary kept her heart and mind on the right things; the things God was doing, the promises He had made. She could see them being fulfilled right before her eyes because she was watching. She was highly favored and chosen because she believed that the Lord would do what He said, and she was willing to put action to her belief.

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Nov 7

I’m Not Supposed To

by Debbie

“I’m not supposed to……,” means my son with autism has done exactly what he is telling me he’s not supposed to do.  What he’s really saying is, “Oops, I’ve messed up again.  Will you forgive me?  Please help me.”

You see, he can’t seem to help himself.  He knows the rules, he can say the rules, he’s a stickler for others following the rules, but in the moment, he breaks the rules.  We have to help him.  We set up boundaries, we put things in place that stop him when he can’t stop himself, and we exact consequences when needed.

The other day when he had come to me for what seemed like the 50th time that day, I exasperatedly called out to the Lord asking why my child can’t obey the rules.  I know he isn’t trying to rebel.  He really does want to be obedient, but once again he isn’t.

Before I could get all of that out, I got a picture of the Lord in my mind with a twinkle in His eye and a chuckle in His response, “Hmmmm, I don’t know, Debbie, why would a child who knows the rule break it?”  Then scriptures about jealously, gossip, and anger danced before me.  “Could it be a desire to please self outweighs the desire to be obedient in that moment?”

Ouch! I had the distinct impression we weren’t talking about my son anymore, but about my “I’m not supposed to’s.”  How many times have I messed up, done exactly what I know I shouldn’t, but in the moment I just can’t seem to help myself.

Maybe my son knows something I don’t.  The minute he realizes he has been disobedient, he doesn’t run away from me, he runs to me; the rule maker, the one who can forgive him and help him find ways to avoid his lack of restraint.

So, I take a cue from my son and turn my heart to the Lord, “Father, I’m not supposed to…., will You forgive me, will you help me?”

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Nov 4

The Closet Cleaner

by Debbie

But when you pray, go into your [most] private room, and, closing the door, pray to your Father, Who is in secret; and your Father, Who sees in secret, will reward you in the open. ~ Matthew 6:6 Amplified Bible (AMP)

One version calls it a closet.  My closet? I wouldn’t even invite my best friend into my closet, at least not until I’ve cleaned it up.  At any given time there are muddy shoes, dirty clothes, suitcases, and lots of stuff that doesn’t belong in there, along with all my clothes.  Definitely not a place I would want to entertain the Lord of Lords and King of Kings.

But that’s the point, right? Our prayer time isn’t supposed to be to entertain the Lord, it’s to allow him into our deepest most intimate space – the closet of our soul.  He doesn’t want us to only show Him the cleaned up areas of our life; the places we only show company.  He wants to come into the space where all our secrets are kept hidden away, where all the clutter and dirt can begin to hinder us from who we really want to present to the world outside.

The closet of our souls can look a lot like the typical closet; old baggage filled with hurts, pains, and unforgiveness, muddy shoes where we’ve veered off the clean path He’s laid before us, dirty clothes in the form of a sin stained heart and mind in desperate need of washing, and all the stuff – the cares of the world piling high, blocking what we really need to access.

Yes, He wants to meet us in the closet of our hearts and do some cleaning only He can do.  Our baggage will be replaced with restoration, healing, and forgiveness.  Muddy shoes will be cleaned and ready for the path ahead.  The sin stained heart and mind will be washed as white as snow, and all the stuff that blocks our vision and keeps us from the blessings waiting for us will be stripped away.

Okay Lord, come on in. I’m in desperate need of a thorough closet cleaning.

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Nov 1

An Eye and a Giant

by Debbie

1 Samuel 17:48 ~ As the Philistine moved closer to attack him, David ran quickly toward the battle line to meet him.

The armies faced off, each on their own hill. The battlefield yawned between them in the valley below. A giant of a man stepped into the valley and began his taunt, striking fear and dismay into the hearts of the men he was calling to battle.

As I face a “giant” of my own I cry out, how do I slay this thing?  What do I do?  How do I take it down?  The giant is so big and no others seem to know how to slay it either, so I go to the one place I know I can get my answers.  I search the story of a young teenage boy who ran quickly toward the battle line to meet and slay his giant.

In the midst of this ancient story I find some precious smooth stones I can use to slay my giant.  Keys to having different eyes for the battle that lies before me.  David saw things differently than his Israelite kin, and this view made the difference between standing scared on the hill and racing head on to engage the enemy; a foe that to the physical eye looked unbeatable, but to the spiritual eye was nothing more than bird food.

He saw the enemy for who he really was.

The Israelite army saw the giant, Goliath, as a man; bigger, stronger, and having mighty armor and weapons – unbeatable.

David saw him as an uncircumcised Philistine who dared to defy the armies of the Living God.

An uncircumcised Philistine meant that Goliath wasn’t under the protection and sovereignty of the Living God, and by coming against God’s people, he had made himself an enemy of their God.

Smooth Stone:  I see ~ I am a child of the Living God, and when the enemy engages me he engages Him.

He understood who was fighting the battle.

Goliath stood and shouted day after day asking them why they would come out and line up for battle because he was a Philistine and they were servants of Saul.  They were to choose a man from among them to be their champion to fight and kill him. The Israelites saw themselves as mere men in the face of this great and mighty enemy.  How could any of them be a champion against this giant?

David understood that God himself was their champion. This uncircumcised Philistine had no chance against their great and mighty deliverer.

Smooth Stone:  I understand ~ Jesus is my champion.  According to Philippians 2:9-11, “Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”  There is nothing that can defeat Him.

He kept his eye for the battle.

David’s older brother tried to remind him that he was just a boy, an insignificant shepherd with a few sheep in the desert.  He accused him of having wrong motives and only wanting to watch others do battle.

Saul, the king of Israel, tried to remind him again that he was just a boy and the enemy was well versed and experienced in battle.

Although David’s brother and King Saul were older, had more experience, and were in a greater position than he was they didn’t know what he knew.  They didn’t see what he saw.

Smooth Stone:  I keep my eye ~ My position, age, knowledge, and experience don’t matter in the equation and neither does my naysayers’.

He remembered his victories.

David had fought and killed lions and bears.  He may not have been experienced with this particular foe, but he was not inexperienced.  He had faced battles before and won.

Smooth Stone:  I remember ~ I have been here before.  I have fought other battles with great odds and won, not by my might or power, but by the power of the Lord.  Even if I hadn’t, He has won the ultimate victory, so I’m covered.

He engaged because this fight was not just a battle, it was a cause.

In 1 Samuel 45 – 47, David’s statement to the Philistine shows exactly how he sees the battle:

“You come to me with a sword and with a spear and with a javelin, but I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.  This day the Lord will deliver you into my hand, and I will strike you down and cut off your head. And I will give the dead bodies of the host of the Philistines this day to the birds of the air and to the wild beasts of the earth that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel, and that all this assembly may know that the Lord saves not with sword and spear.  For the battle is the Lord’s and he will give you into our hand.”

David ran to the battle line because he saw through spiritual eyes the heart of God to fight for His people and proclaim His name in all the earth as well as to remind His people that the Lord saves, but not with the weapons of mere men.

Smooth Stone:  I engage ~ I can run to the battle line because this battle isn’t just my own. I fight for a greater cause than just taking down my giant. I come to the battle in the name of Jesus, my salvation and my deliverer, to proclaim His name in all the earth, and remind my fellow Saints that the Lord saves, but not with earthly weapons.

The battlefield stretches before me.  I pick up my five smooth stones; I see, I understand, I keep my eye, I remember, and I engage.  My pace quickens, my foot steps sure, and my eye is on Jesus.

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Dec 17

Not Just A Baby

by Debbie

I said goodbye to my daddy this past week.  As I sat by his bedside and his last hours grew near, my first thoughts were, “Lord, I had hoped we would get through Christmas.”  But as the hours ticked away, and my mother and sisters and I sang hymns to him, read scripture passages, and prayed, a different feeling filled my heart.

I know why I celebrate Christmas; the birth of my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, but there is that part of me that thinks Christmas should be happy and cheerful, pretty and fun, and family and friends getting together to celebrate.  It’s Jesus’ birthday!

Losing my daddy this time of year brought an unexpected understanding that deepens my joy of the true reason I celebrate Christmas.

Psalm 23 was one of my daddy’s favorites.  This past week, as we read it over him many times, each time I read, “Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me,” I was aware that we all walk through that valley; we will all face death one day.  Our journey here on earth will be done, and then what?  Because of the baby Jesus lying in a manger, we can face that day with great joy and rejoicing if we’ve accepted and received His free gift of salvation by believing and placing our faith in Him.  If we’ve opened our eyes to see that He isn’t just a sweet story about a tiny baby and nothing more.

That baby was the physical manifestation of the promises throughout the Old Testament; the prophecies of a savior.  Salvation came to earth that day in the body of a baby boy, but that baby would grow to be a man, die on a cross, and rise from the dead so that we might have eternal life.  That day marked, in our physical realm, the beginning of God’s plan of redemption being fulfilled.

He is so much more! Simeon in Luke 2:28-32 saw that in the tiny baby he held – Simeon took him in his arms and praised God, saying: Sovereign Lord, as you have promised, you now dismiss your servant in peace. For my eyes have seen your salvation which you have prepared in the sight of all people, a light for revelation to the Gentiles and for glory to your people Israel.

My heart is saddened that I’ll no longer be able to see my daddy here on earth, but because of the baby Jesus the angels proclaimed, the shepherds came to see, the Wisemen traveled so far to worship; the Savior of the World, my heart rejoices because I know I will see him on the other side of the veil in the presence of our Savior.

Isaiah 9:1a – Nevertheless, there will be no more gloom for those who were in distress.

Isaiah 9:2 – The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.

Isaiah 9:6-7 – For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.  Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end.  He will reign on David’s throne and over his kingdom, establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever. The zeal of the Lord Almighty will accomplish this.

Christmas has not been overshadowed by this loss because I understand that my daddy is finally truly home for Christmas. He is seeing with his eyes what we can only get a glimpse of in our hearts.

Thank you Lord Jesus, Light of the World.  May those walking in darkness turn and come into your glorious light, may they come to know the joy and peace you so freely give.

Psalm 23:6 – Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

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Sep 5

#FreshVision

by Debbie

Blog picture heart-made-with-hands

James 4:7 Submit yourselves, then, to God.  Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

“Mom, I made the team!” my daughter excitedly exclaimed.

Wow, what a difference a few days makes.  If you read what I wrote last week in A Life Interrupted, you know that my daughter’s heart was broken when she was told she had been cut in the first round of tryouts for her middle school volleyball team.

She came home sick after the third day of hard tryouts and missed the first round cut announcement.  Since we couldn’t get in touch with the coach, she started calling her friends.  After three girls said she had been cut, the tears began to flow.  The dream she had been working toward was dashed.

Sometimes the dream we hold in our heart isn’t really on the path God has for our lives.  We want it to be, but God has something better for us; a different plan – we just can’t see it while we are holding onto a dream we don’t want to let go of.

This is a time for fresh vision.  This is a time to submit ourselves to God, lay it at His feet and open our heart to the new place He wants to take us. We also must resist the devil’s attempt to beat us up and cause us to question God’s love.

On Tuesday morning the next round of tryouts was scheduled, and we decided that since she hadn’t heard about the cut from the coach, we needed to verify it from the source.  She showed up at tryouts and found out that she hadn’t been cut after all.

Some dreams can be lost because of what others are telling us.  We can trust them and believe they are helping us, but we run the risk they are wrong.

Our answers must come from the source.

God is the only one who holds our future in His hands. He is the only one who knows what tomorrow brings. We must submit to Him and allow Him to lead us where He wants us to go.

A fresh vision from God breathes life and passion back into our lives; back into our dreams. Fresh vision stirs our hearts and sets things into motion driving us forward into the plans God has for us.

Lay your hopes and dreams at the feet of Jesus, and ask Him to give you a fresh vision for them.  Ask Him to show you if the ones you’ve been holding on to aren’t His.

Resist the devil because he will be quick to tell you that your dreams don’t matter to God.

The thief comes only to steal, kill, and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. ~John 10:10

The great news is the devil will flee from us when we resist him.

Last week we were weeping at the loss of a dream.  This week we understand even better that Jesus is our only source for the answers to our heart’s deepest desires because He is the one who puts them there, and He is the only one who can give us the fresh vision to see them through.

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Aug 31

A Life Interrupted

by Debbie

Blog curvy road

Romans 5:2b – 4 ~ And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance, character; and character, hope.

My heart is aching this morning.  In one moment my daughter’s dream of playing on her middle school volleyball team was dashed when she was cut after three hard days of tryouts.

My mother’s heart weeps for her, and as I groped through my mind for something comforting to say to her to make it all better, the scripture I had been studying all week continued to play through my mind. We are to rejoice in our sufferings, but today we are weeping. Is that wrong? How do we get to a place of rejoicing?

Does God weep for us when life’s sufferings tear at our hearts; when life doesn’t go the way we planned or thought it would?

John 11:33-35 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. “Where have you laid him?” he asked.  Come and see, Lord,” they replied.  Jesus wept.

Jesus knew that he was going to go to the tomb where Lazarus lay dead and raise him. He knew that the outcome was going to be good, and in a short time all those who were weeping would be rejoicing, but at that moment those he loved were broken hearted, and it broke his heart.

We know as believers that the story for us ends well.  We know that there will come a day with no tears and no sorrow, and we will be in the presence of our Lord and Savior for eternity.

But, in the moment when life interrupts us, our hearts are heavy and we still have to walk it out.  We still have to persevere through the pain.  As we persevere through that pain, life lessons are learned and we are never the same.

If we allow Jesus to lead and guide us through those places, and allow Him to do His work in us as He molds the twists and turns of our life into the direction He has for us, then character will be built, and hope will spring forth to a new season; a new calling.

How can we move through those places and continue to persevere when our heart is breaking?  How do we #stickwithit when we just want to give up?

Lysa TerKeurst says in her book What Happens When Women Say Yes to God, “A real sign of spiritual maturity is looking to God not for comfort and convenience, but for purpose and perspective.  Comfort and convenience lead to complacency. On the other hand, purpose and perspective lead to the perseverance that is evident in those living a truly devoted life.”

God has a purpose for our life. He has a purpose for the interruption that has just moved us in a new direction.  He loves us more than we could possibly love our own children, and I can’t imagine more love than that; more desire for their welfare and good, but He does.

We can trust that He isn’t withholding or causing something in our life because He wants to see us suffer – no, He is hurting with us.  We trust that He has a perfect plan that He is working out in His timing, weaving it all together into a beautiful tapestry to bring Him glory, and to equip us to do what He is calling us to do.

That’s what it really is all about isn’t it? Bringing God glory by fulfilling the calling He has on our life.

We may think that the twists and turns of life are interruptions, but I think they are just the turns in the road God is leading us down as He is equipping us for every good work (2Timothy 3:17).

I don’t know why my daughter didn’t make the team, she’s a good player and has the skills, but I have to believe that God’s purpose and plan for her don’t include that dream.  This could be that turn in the road that leads her down a new path where He wants her focus to be.

So, I will hug my daughter and weep with her today, but we will also rejoice knowing that it will be okay because God’s plans for her are perfect, and we will watch expectantly to see what new adventures He is leading her to tomorrow.

 

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Aug 8

#PALMS UP

by Debbie

OBS palms up

I walk up with hands clenched, held tightly across my heart. These things are important to me. Some of them are my life itself, I think. How can I f

reely release them? It’ll cost me way too much.

Then I look at the hands held out to receive it all. There is something there already. I look closer. Scars. Nail scars. The ultimate price paid for my life. My eyes meet His. There is only love there. He’s not asking for these things to steal them

away from me; He’s taking them into His care.

This is freedom I’m gazing at. Why am I holding tight to this? Although I feel like I just stepped over a cliff and I’m free falling, my hands open and release everything into His. Things tumble out I didn’t even know were there.

Why am I so desperately holding on to pride, control, doubt, fear, anger? I guess with closed hands holding onto the things I love so much, it’s hard to see the other things that get caught up in that grip.

I turn my palms up and show Him their emp

tiness. He smiles and says, “Now you are ready.”

“Ready for what?” I ask. He won’t say, but just smiles at me with a twinkle in His eye.

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. — Deuteronomy 6:5

When you read these words, it’s easy to pass over them and say, “Okay, I’m supposed to love God with all of me.” The problem is, that isn’t so easy.

Our theme this week in the Proverbs 31 On-line Bible Study is #Palms Up. Palms up ready to receive all that God has for us. But after reading and studying this verse over the week, I realize that palms up also means letting go of anything that I keep trying to hang on to.

All of me includes my desperate love for my family. The thought of something bad happening to my husband or my children sends a shiver o

f fear right through me. I’m supposed to hold on to them, right? No, #Palms Up, Lord.

As I examine my heart more closely, things rise to the surface that I know I’m holding on to as well; control is a biggy. Why do I hold on to these? #Palms Up, Lord.

All of these things and more ramble around in my heart vying for my attention and attachment.

Idols?

My head says, “No, I don’t have any idols.” My

heart says, “Anything you are choosing to hang on to that keeps you from freely giving your whole heart to Jesus is an idol.”

Over the last few days as I’ve come trembling before the Lord confessing that I’m scared – scared of what may come; scared that His call may cost me too much, Jesus has met me there with loving nail scarred hands assuring me that His hands are the only true place of safety.

#Palms up, Lord!

www.proverbs31.org

http://www.proverbs31.org

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Jun 5

The Water and The Fire

by Debbie

DSC_2276

It was midnight, and once again I was awake; crushing fear causing me to gasp for breath.  Was he breathing?  I slowly turned and gently placed my hand on my husband’s back.  The slow rhythmic breathing calmed me just a little.  Now my thoughts raced toward my son in the next room.  I knew logically that he was just fine, but the terror inside me drove me out of my bed and to his room to check once more.

Just days before I had experienced my third miscarriage, and now a gripping fear of losing the two people I loved most in life was closing in on me.   While the other two miscarriages were devastating, this one seemed to knock the wind out of me.  How could this have happened again?

Could I trust God anymore?  That was really the question on my heart.  I had lost my first husband at 20 in a horrible accident, endured years of heart wrenching infertility, and now the loss of three babies.  What would stop life from ripping away everything else I held dear?

I grappled with this question over the next two days until, crumpled on the floor weeping, I realized that the only safe place to be was in the hand of God.  The loss of anyone or anything in this temporal world would forever be out of my control.  I could choose to walk away from God and try to control my life and everything in it to no avail or I could place my life in God’s hands and know that even if I lost everything I hold dear, He would still have me safely in His care.

A peace washed over me like I had never before experienced.  The fear that had held my heart so tightly the past few days lost its grip, and a new-found calm and confidence replaced its choking squeeze.  I wasn’t any safer physically from life’s tragedies than I had been before, but I was spiritually and emotionally safe for eternity.

Isaiah 43:1a-3b

But now, this is what the Lord says—
he who created you, Jacob,
he who formed you, Israel:
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.
3 For I am the Lord your God,
the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;

God has been faithful to this promise towards me.  Since those many years ago when I placed my life into the loving hands of Jesus, I’ve walked through waters that did not wash over me and fires that did not burn me.  I’ve lost five more babies to miscarriage since that time; eight in all, said goodbye in this physical realm to my sweet daughter who lost her battle with a muscle disease, and faced some other big life challenges along the way.  Throughout them all I have felt His loving hand comforting me, guiding me, and upholding me.

God doesn’t promise us that He will keep us from the waters and the fire, but He does promise He will walk us through them and keep them from overtaking us and destroying us.  We have to trust that the One who created and formed us is the One who redeems us and calls us His own.  He’s invested in us.

I’ll be honest; it hasn’t been easy staying in His hands. For some reason I keep trying to jump out and keep things safe myself, only to realize that this is futile, and I quickly march myself back into the palm of His hand instead of dangling precariously on the fingertip. It has to be a conscious effort for me. I have to decide to do it daily and sometimes moment by moment, but it is the only safe place to stay when the waters rage and the flames lick at my life threatening to set me ablaze.

Life Prayer Thoughts on Faith Uncategorized

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